Easier to pretend I'm ok.
Fake a smile, answer "good" to the question, "How are you?"
I've been doing it so long it's like second nature now. In the end it's going to come back and bite me in the ass, I know it. Those that believed the facade will say "But we had no idea!" Well, there was a reason it was there. There was a damn good reason I wanted you to have no idea.
There are some that get an inkling that something is not right and they will prod lightly at the topic seeing if I will crack. For one or two I may, the rest, that wall comes up even stronger, just to convince you that the little glimpse of my pain was just a figment of your imagination.
It feels almost.....old, tired, overdone to write about it. Suck it up, girly. You are tougher than this. God, you are starting to sound like an emo kid. How sad is that, right?
This is where I nod my head, agree and assure you once more....I am ok.
Really.
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