Sleepy ramblings

So I haven't blogged in a few days and here I am at work, writing from my iPhone. Seems I do most of my thinking at work; that's to be expected though. I feel like I live here. My only day off this week is Sunday and next week, if my one client comes home, I'll work all 7 days. I'm a self proclaimed workaholic.

For the first time, in a long time, I can honestly say I'm happy. Is everything where it should be? Nope. Was it easy getting here? Not at all, but I'm okay with that. I don't feel that despair I felt before. That's a big thing for me. So many times I'd look in the mirror and wonder what the hell I was doing here because no matter what I did, nothing was getting better. Only worse.

I don't feel that way anymore. And it's all Yasu's fault. Of course there are other factors that have helped. I have wonderful friends and family who have supported me as best they could, but even through all that, I still felt like my world was imploding on me. But this recent happiness, what's keeping me going (besides my children of course) has been him. He's made me smile when no one else could. He's made me feel loved even when I've thought I didn't deserve it and he's stood by me even when I pushed him away.

It's been a long haul for us. The last year and a half has had it's major ups and downs but somehow we've survived it. And through all of the trials and tribulations we've somehow built something stronger and closer than what we had before. Something I didn't think was possible.

I want you to know how much I love you. How much you mean to me. How I thank the universe everyday you are in my life. I also want you to know how much I look forward to what is to come. I'm here, always and forever. Please don't ever forget that.